Sunday, December 03, 2006

Weird Missouri Weather

Thanksgiving week, we closed the pool and set up the Christmas tree in the same day, bare foot and in shorts! It was a balmy week of 80 degrees and I was in heaven!

This week, we had our first major storm plow through. I spent a fortune on food and projects to do while iced in, and then we lucked out and were jussssst far enough south NOT to get it! We are however suffering through some of the coldest temps we've seen in awhile. Shauna out in DC, is 30 degrees warmer than us now!

Today, we finally bought the big screen. To everyones dismay, not LCD(sorry gabe) but the rear projection DLP, which would net us more screen size for what we wanted to invest, plus more longevity. Im not sure how it looks, and the sarge is still struggling with putting the stand together while trying to watch the chiefs!

Molly Kate brought home a note from school. She did the big job on the toy toy!! YAY! She is being so stubborn about training....1/2 pure mule, and 1/2 is just shyness!! Who wouldnt NOT WANT people in there cheering on such a private thing! poor kid.

Shauna was home for T-day, but not the boys...hoping for a bigger housefull for Christmas....but mama has to realize that everyone has lives, and both the boys have 'significant others' who also have needs. *sigh* Bill made it home for deer season, and we go to Springfield to see gabe, so at least Molly was THRILLED! Seeing her sibs is the highlight of her life!

We are busy preparing the house for the season (it's so much more fun to do with Molly helping...she is SO busy with the tree decorating, which i'm sure will last all month.) And really looking forward to a New Year...the end of this one has been so full of tragedy...I'm ready to be done with it, and move on to some fun.

My friend and Confidant lost his marriage after many, many years.....and I see him struggling so hard with his decision. All my prayers are with him, as well as my friends from 'the room' ....the place where my girlfriends are.

There are 2 dealing with serious health issues with their 'angel babies', one dealing with her own health issues as well as those of her children, and my bestest bud...who has the world on her shoulders right now, with the beast attacking her sister-in-law, and struggles with relationships of her own.

Kind of vague i know....but still close in my heart and thoughts....amazingly enough, ALL of them were there for me last month, as we dealt with the awfulness here. What great friends i have!

Walmart is just simmering...we've seen some demonstrations, heard rumors, and i feel like come january my job is gonna be ripped right out from under me. I saw that Ford motor did the same thing this month. I hope that the payouts, or 'severence' that they offer is as good as's tough working among the tension, rumors, and split between management & well as the split between old time associates & the new hires. I really think the Home Office is screwing up with this whole plan. Time will tell.

Thursday, November 16, 2006

On a high note, I'm back from Chicago, and had a FAB time with my little girl, who was sworn in by the Ill Supreme Ct!! I finally got to meet her friends and classmates (who were AWESOME) and some of their parents!

My heart does break a little, for this young woman, as she tries to balance love, life, and a new career in a foreign city. She is flying home from D.C. for Thanksgiving, and I hope to fatten her up a bit, and let her rest with no worries.

Mama's house=No Worries. It's usually messy, but filled with laughter, and warmth, and the best place in the world, to take an all day nap induced by a huge meal.

On the sad side of things, we are just recovering from Double Funerals 2 weeks ago, of friends and daddies of two little girls that go to school with my molly. Today, I join our entire school district, to bury one of the daddy's wife.

Miss Vicky went into the hospital, the day after we buried her husband. She never came home. A frail woman, she could not recover from the grief. It seem to engulf and eventually kill her.

Miss Vicky taught my oldest three children, in the first grade. We have known each other a long time. Since both of us found the 'love of our lives' late in life.....AND chose to have a child in this new love, we became friends again. We shared the disgust of having people gossip, and THEN have the gaul to ask us about our 'grandbabies'....we shared the kinship of the miracle of love, that only us two understood.

Today will be difficult for me, more tragic than the Wall of Shock that hit with the boat accident. She was only 45.

And a little 6 year old girl, has to try and understand death, being orphaned, and moving in with papa and mama.

Big week, and if anyone out there has an extra prayer or two for this family....please do what you can to ease their grief.


Friday, November 03, 2006

and another month flies by...the big, light-up pumpkin has been moved indoors, and into storage, and my thoughts are toying with the ideas of the upcoming holiday season....Do these seasons pass as fast for you?

I got a little vacation, and flew to Texas to lounge in my girlfriend's pool, sleep deep, eat too well, laugh hard, cry harder, and bask in the conversation of good friends. My thanks to all of you for coming, and especially to brandi, who hosted all the gabby women...I miss you all terribly, and can't wait till the next time we can all be together. My prayers and much gratitude to your families, for letting you all slip away for a bit just to entertain me. Loves will come and go, but girlfriends are forever.....(sistahhhhhhhhhs)

And back i flew to the rat-race and my job....which prior to this "flight' thing, was my career. *sigh*

Everyone has been SO worked up by wal~marts latest moves, that i can barely think straight! I live day to day in fear of losing my job, they are watching every move anyone makes, and people are leaving by the droves. Long term assoc's are work family...people that loved their jobs are taking pay cuts, to get while the gittin's good.

They continue to spin to the press, making everyone think the assoc's are fat and lazy and whiners....nothing could be further from the truth.They have instituted policies, that are making the long term assoc quit...or stay and work AWFUL hours, (stay till midnight, be back in at 8am) one of the many ways they have to force you to quit. We are no longer wanted or needed, as ms chambers has decided that the 19 yr old college student, working part=time, can do everything that i can do, at a fraction of the cost....she thinks that they will save the company in the long run, as i am sure to develope diabetes and/or have a heart attack....but what she doesnt understand, that in 20 years, i've never had an accident....The young ones? oh man, it's constant with them...the constant jacking around that kids do, is just one reason why.

And the incident with the blow-jobs in the hay trailor???? well, lets just say that there were no adults out there....

The only way we can save ourselves (and the company) is to bring in a union...something i never thought i EVER would say....but what other options do we have??? we just can't stand up to Bentonville alone....something i never thought we would HAVE to do! And when Bentonville screams about the onset of the union....i hope they direct the screaming at the exec's that caused it.

Ive never been a union man....but since the H.O. quit caring about the workers that enabled them to have that second home, and jag in the driveway....i am about ready to side with ANYONE that can stop this mess! It is so totally not fair. And not a word from the Walton's....

To top things off, last nights communication was laced with what is yet to come. They will cut my vacation, my sick pay, and my profit sharing....Sam gave me the profit sharing, as a reward for the 20 past years....and all of us that got this company up and off the ground. The untold late hours, the unpaid lunch breaks, the 4am warehouse 'parties' We felt obligated to do whatever necessary to make it happen......and now??? now they are taking away my retirement. *sigh*

It seems, that AFTER the holidays (when they've squeezed every last bit of blood we have to offer) they will offer the 15 yr plus assoc a "severence pkg". If we choose not to accept it, and stay with our job (which many have to due to the insurance factor) then they will force us out, and we lose the profit sharing anyway. I hope the severence pay, is as nice as the one they let the embezzler at Headquarters leave with....they paid him about 6 million. THEY PAID HIM 6 MILLION AFTER HE GOT CAUGHT RIPPING US OFF!! wow....and my annual poverty wage seems to be what is going to drag them all down in the future??? amazing, isnt it???

I live between rumors, lies, innuendos and stress. The company is lying, the union is lying, and people are FEARING for the future. This is not the work environment that Mr. Sam had in mind. This is Susan *f/u-in-da CHAMBERS, and Eduweirdo Castro WRONG....I know that one day, when they are writing the eulogy of the company....they will know that those two led in the demise.

On the home front, and probably causing an "unexused absence" was the loss of two of our young men, in this small ozark area. Loved by all, their lives we're lost doing what they a bass tourney. They left behind classmates of my kindergartner, and the mommies that now have to go on and raise these beautiful children alone.

Halloween was a brighter day, and i saw one of the children smile and laugh again....My missy was picked as "prettiest costume" in her little class, and while momma beamed....i watched her walk from the place where the finalist were seated....back to her classmates. She wasnt too impressed with the whole deal....i mean...she was happy to be in the parade, but at the end of the day she would rather just be with her buds. I like the way she thinks.

Uncle Jack has been diagnosed with terminal cancer, and Little Bill made it home with his wonderful girlfriend, and a new baby visit with him, and take his old mom, and his little sister...on a hike through the ozarks woods. It had been raining for a week, and he came home, the sun came out, and the temp rose to 80! That boy just does it that way for me.!!

I fly to chicago this week, to see my eldest sworn in by the Ill Supreme Court. She makes my world bright also. I havent seen her for awhile, and all my mommy cells are anxious to hug her!

Pray for all the above families, if you have the time....Make sure you take a second to kiss your spouse and your children tonight, and PLEASE keep in mind, that words like "retard" used as an nothing but show ignorance, intolerance, and make you less than a desireable collegue, by one in four of anyone within earshot.

We need to continue to strive to make this world a little better, than it was when we got it.



Monday, September 11, 2006

my step daughter works in manhattan and today, i'm listening to the news, and remembering the sound of her voice, and the voices of others i know that live there....

and what i'm not hearing, not even from the RAGE! new yorkers were/are PISSED OFF! the reporters seem to be missing that......


It was just about this time in the morning, that i glanced up at the television's news. I hollered at the sarge and the boys to come into my bedroom, and remember laughing at them, as they all tried to enter the door way at exactly the same some laurel and hardy movie.

We were amazed that some dumb ass pilot, could have missed his mark by that much....the picture on the tv, did not begin to display the huge hole left in the 1st tower...i rationallized that it was a small plane. All of stood there, mouths agape....outraged and confused, but not mentally being able to grasp the reality of the situation.

I remember the shock, when the 2nd tower was we KNEW this was not some sort of freak we KNEW......and we gazed into the face of pure evil.

Today, we remain outraged here in the mid/south, .....we know where the blame lays....and it's not on our politicians

we remember the ENORMOUS amount of lives lost....taken....MURDERED

and to this day, and on this day.... we continue to grieve....

For Larry and I especially, for our brothers and sisters in public service. As the general population were trying to escape, the brothers were heading up the stairs.. to guide, treat the wounded, put out the fires.....the ultimate sacrifice.

we feel the pain of each and every person lost there that day, and the pain of thier families...we hold you dear to hearts, those that were left behind to mourn. God Bless all continue to be in my daily prayers. I hope you know....i hope you take some comfort from the fact that the entire world prays for you, and mourns with you.

we remember

Sunday, September 10, 2006


jeeeeeeeeeez! i think i've survived, but i'm still not eating much, and DON'T MAKE ME LAUGH!

i got a bug, which manifested late thursday (before everyone else's labor day holiday) and put me down for the next 6 days. I was sure it was salmonilla, or ecoli.....but it was just the flu

i thought i was going to die....and amidst the dying, was spraying bleach behind everything i touched....the only thing worse than me having the flu, would be to pass it on to the baby, or my ole man....either of the two of them, would have ended up in the hospital.....

a disease survivable at home, only be a mommy

and worse??? lower intestinal.....nuff said

i will mention, that i could not keep a popsicle in my system for more than 5 minutes, and the pain and cramping was seconded only by hard labor in childbirth.

i cannot remember ever being this sick....and only after #2 trip to the doc, did i get meds to calm the cramping....class 4 meds, that left me dingy and with hairy teeth....but managed to totally stop the cramping, and allowed some rest. (i had been up and runnin *no pun* every 10 minutes prior to that)

make sure your house is disinfected, your diet is healthy, and if you notice an odd odor, eminating from one of your kids....keep them home!

i missed the biggest day of the year in the the last 20 years, ive called in maybe 3 times....and have vowed never to get another bug, as long as i live! Damn the things that miss molly brings home to me from kindergarten!!
Two more associates announced their departure at the store this week....and they are scrambling to fill positions. They got a dept mngr for my old dept...and a good one, but one doesnt replace two....especially two hard's a pity Wal~mart doesn't understand that the hard workers, ARE the old timers....*sigh*

no new policies as far as i can see, and no signing up about layaway, so i guess the gossip mongers missed that one.

My little lawyer girl, is in her new apt in D.C. , and shopping for furniture this weekend....she gets her first real paycheck this week. She continues to bust my buttons, and we're both ticking off the seconds, to get the results from the bar.

My little kindergarten girl, is ate up with congestion of the chest and nose, and evidently it showed at school on friday...she brought home a note telling us of temper tantrums, hitting, kicking, pushing, and generally being uncooperative....she did NOT have to turn over her 'good behavior' worm, though.....they spotted her runny nose, and wrote it off to that.

Haven't heard much from the boys...they have called, and seem a little overwhelmed with life in general, and all that has to happen to make life happen. Parents should let their kids see a little bit more of the stress involved in maintaining a house and bills...sometimes, in order to protect them, we don't give them a clue as to how HARD it is, to make it in the world today. It always seems to be such a surprise to them!

And i have to spend the day, catching up on my continuing education...have to log 20 hours to recertify, and that deadline is approaching soon (had intended to do that on my 4 day weekend, which was spent in the loo....hmmmmmm i shoulda set the laptop up in there!) Shouldn't be too hard to nascar, missouri tigers, kansas city chiefs, and opening day of the NFL season, seems to be a priority for the sarge!

Unfortunately...i think i also will be closing the pool today...i took a walk with the german shep this morning, and it was only about 60 degrees, and although the leaves are all still green, had the slight odor of autumn surrounding me....might be a good day to check out the new childrens park, with miss 'icky nose' today, too.

I really hate to see the end of summer....

Monday, September 04, 2006

big week for us, both on the walmart front, as well as health care for molly

first molly...NOTHING is harder, than taking a child with special needs, to hillbilly doctor's offices...and unfortunately, since we have to see a local, to get a referral to a REAL dr's office...we have to go through the headache.

this time? her ears...we went to a local dr (he was great, his staff i was not impressed with) who was an ENT...we had to see an audiologist first...who sent us to get her ears cleaned, and then back for a hearing test.

at the ear cleaning IMMEDIATELY he starts talking 'pappoose' or 'sedation' at the like 'why don't we just try it first, like you would with a typical 6 year old'....and sure enough, she made it through, with less screaming than the 'tippie' in the next room.

the nurse had to have me spell 'trisomy' and asked if it had anything to do with her downs syndrome...AUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!

the audiologist looked confused when molly started signing to her....she was watching us thru a window, in a sound proof booth, and molly was smart enought to figure out that the A maybe couldnt hear she signed 'MORE DUCK' to get the A to light up the duck again....

i get a blank stare from the A (audiologist) and explain to her...molly is signing to you...are ya gittin it??

welllllllllllllll it seems that the woman that WORKS WITH PEOPLE WHO CANT HEAR......CAN'T SIGN!!!


all in all...we got our referral....and we'll head off in mid-sept, to see how molly's hearing is...although the A said she could not see any movement in molly's ear drums, whatsoever...she wasn't sure if molly couldnt hear! AUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

I made it all the way through, without slapping anyone....

Wal~marts 7 phases of reorganization keep on coming, and most of the long-termers are seeking employment elsewhere....much to the amazement of my store manager...i cannot believe, in this day and age, that this guy is not online, and keeping up with his business...he didnt even know who Susan Chambers was!!

They are done with us, and want us to leave, and we are obliging. I hope they are happy with the results. There has to be something illegal, with our new exec. vice president, printing in a memo, that all of the tenured associates are obese, will have heart trouble and diabetes, and the only way for the company to continue to line the executive pockets, is for them to dump the aged associates...."a 2 year assoc. can do the work of a 10 yr assoc, at a fraction of the cost"

little does she know, that they WILL HAVE TO START CLOSING ON HOMECOMING AND PROM NIGHT! and you can kiss off any sat/sun morning you just can't work when you've been sucking on a beer bong all night!!

They will announce, that we will be open on Christmas now.

Still wanting the company to be amazes me that they are BEGGING for the associates to get some kind of reprensentation.

signs are suppose to go up this weekend, regarding the closing of all layaways.....and sept 11th, seems to be D-Day, for the releasing of other new policies. They've cut our raises, they've capped our wages, changed the schedules, so that there is no way for someone to work for them, AND have a family.....and done everything but issue a mandate telling the associates that BUILT the company, that now we are too big of an expense, and need to leave.

I'm sure they think that the company will survive, being run by a bunch of teenagers, that DON'T CARE! but are cheaper labor than us. We shall see. We all sold our stock, and stopped the auto-purchase of it. No need in investing in a company, that won't invest in us.

I'm lucky, as my husband has a retirement plan, and insurance for us to fall back on(his company actually rewared him for all his years of loyalty) heart goes out to the thousands that don't have that safety net. Shame on the new wal~mart upper echelon....they have defamed the WHOLE principal of the's solid base....and the reason for it's success. SHAME!

Saturday, July 22, 2006

what a day!

yesterday at the end of my shift....almost 5pm...almosssssst 5pm, my husband calls. He is informing me of an AWFUL storm at home. (keeping in mind i do have the new roof up, and the pool redone, and the a/c unit replaced from the last storm....but not the inside ceilings where the water damage came in, nor the tahoe's 'hail-u-lite' pounded out.

i call the bosses...and meet them at the front, where we start to lay down mats in the vestibule (noticing our new brick floor has buckled up 2 feet!) just remodeled in Jan.

the sky goes from blue, to grey to black to solid midnight in about 10 minutes. (we've had the worst heat wave i can remember in weeks...for the last 5 days...each day triple digits in temp, and over 60% humidity. The most 'outside' i've been in the last 5, is from the house to the car....from the car to the store...and visa versa)

I'm not sure what NOAA called for us, but the town's warning sirens take off, and the cattle get nervous...Our job is to keep them off the bricks, away from the front doors... as we don't know what's coming...and the bricks get slick.


People are INSANE! The storm hits....and they start RUNNING outside..'MY WINDOWS ARE DOWN!!" (one woman that did that, was in a wheelchair, and could barely walk...she was hobbling as fast as she could)

We shut off the power, and close the doors as now we're looking at 80 m/p/h straight line winds, and quarter sized hail....and yes, the panicked cows continue to surge forward, to get a good look....and oh yes....TO CHECK THEIR CELL SIGNALS!!

The kicker was a young-trailor-trash lookin mommy, who had a cart of THREE BABIES!! I'm talkin' 6 months...18mos...and maybe 2yr old in her cart....'she just HAS to leave' ...and marches RIGHT OUT THERE with those babies. Did i mention 80 m/p/h winds???? MOOOOOO!!

The funniest was he-man....who puffed out his chest, fist on hips, and announces "I'm going out there"

As he steps out into the terror....a big ole bolt of lightning CRASHES right in front of the doors.....and her RUNS back in to the chuckles of the 100 or so shoppers who have gathered up there. (It was rumored that they gathered people to the middle of the store *tornado style* but i never heard that call) He man's pants were pretty wet....he blamed it on the rain.

Another customer who escaped during that same episode, said when she stuck her key into her door, she lit up, skin tingling...and she decided also at that wasnt' really that necessary to get home right that minute, and returned to the store.

The dingy thing we were tracking this storm (as we really DO try to keep an eye out for our herds) we KNEW that this was a fast, but devistating storm. We KNEW it would 'hit and run' and tried to calm the animals by telling this to them...."Folks, if you could just give it 5 or 10'll all be done, and really SAFE for you to leave." Evidently, we have a bunch of deaf cows.

To top it off, when i was closing the 'out' side of the doors (power off-lock down) One of the support team came up yelling about something....(voice three octives higher than normal) right in the midst of closing, i glanced up to see if was really him, or another siren)...and BANG slammed my thumb in the closing doors...the equivilant of slamming a car door on it. (*&*^&%$%*^)*%&$%$%&_(_*&&7...and i couldn't even cuss!! grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr and now i'm minus one of my opposable thumbs.


Friday, April 14, 2006

Well...too much going on...ive been on vacation, and while i was gone, Walmart started new policies all over. Management is working more, and those like me (20 year assoc's) are now a liability to the company

I might add, I hit the big 20 years, while i was away....but have been back for the full week, and no one has even MENTIONED this milestone. I was quite disappointed by that, but that is the way it's heading.

Had a meeting with my supervisor, whom i love dearly, and told her straight up, if she needed to 'lose me', to just do it, and not to jeapordize her job by fighting for 'what is right'

She is a single parent, and if Walmart is going to hang me, i should hang alone....damn, a retirement plan would have been nice from this company, after all the hard work and hours that we've given them, helping them to become the powerhouse that they are, but instead, im planning my own 'funeral' ....i miss you, sam.

We went to chicago, and met up with a bunch of online friends, from molly's parenting room, inclucing a family from AUSTRALIA!! what a great time, with good friends, and new friends, and the best kids in the world.

Came home, and started preparation for Shauna's graduation, which has been interrupted with the FANTASTIC NEWS!! she has not only made the selection for the Presidential Management Fellowship, BUT.....


she was so sweating having to settle, and having the deadlines to make those decisions, when the chief general council of the FTA (federal transit administration) David Horner.

selected her to be his 'legal policy analyst'!! a MAJOR coup!!...I cried all night last night, i am so proud of this child.

she said his statement to her, after she informed him that she wouldnt finish the bar until this July, was

"your perception on all of this, is way beyond your years"

he sounds like a pretty perceptive guy, himself!

I sent the public release to the quill newspaper this morning, but halted the presses, as she's freaking i'll jinx the final 'hammering out' of the details....(salary)

mama is on cloud nine.

on the DS front? Molly Kate was elected by her peers, to represent her class as a queen canidate, for the spring festival (kindergarten) !! we got a pricess dress...and she 'hammed it up' something fierce, as she processed onto the stage, and heard her name called, much to the delight of the entire crowd. Her little escort, was soooooooooo scared HE was crying!!

wasn't quite how i thought it would play out.

nice to be back...


Sunday, February 12, 2006

good morning! im still here.....

once a month...consider my postings a lunar cycle...or maybe it's just that i only get a chance to think once a month!

We managed to get thru the holidays, and rolled right into a remodel at the store....and really, it's been extremely organized compared to the two i've seen before....contained chaos we'll call it.

the general population...the customers...were my biggest surprise. They SO HATED us TOUCHING their store...without the benefit of personal consultations of each and every one of them! They yell...offer suggestions...and complain about the type of flooring we're going with. They complain about that alot...and loudly.

I'm still struggling with being such a different person at home.

I dunno...age....attitude...everything....i thought i was done changing as a person, but the morph continues. Thank God i have the kind of husband i do. He is alot like my molly (the youngest with downs sydrome) I know, i know..that sounds so bad....or maybe it correctly describes this disorder.

Both are very comfortable, and can sustain any treatment, dr's, change of any kind, as long as the routine is not interrupted...or, done so at an easy rate, so that they can adjust to the change.

Supper on time....(both) cheetoes in the snack cupboard (her) coke in the fridge (him) dora on tv (her) missouri football/basketball/nascar/pro-football/baseball on tv (him)

as long as those things are present.. anything else can happen...just keep the solid base of monotony at home...and we can handle the rest.

I hear women complaining about the mundane of it all...but me??? I like it. I live in the world of retail, where ANYTHING can happen at the drop of a hat....and it is so nice to get home to the mundane...i find great comfort in it.

It's snowing this weekend....there is a huge nor'easter out east, but talked to shauna this morning, and DC got just a dusting...she is amazed at the panic that proceded that near miss. "nothin like chicago"

we had flurries for the past two days here in southern missouri...none of which have made it to the ground, just the pretty flurrying. we live in a snow globe...warm, with a view.

Our world was rocked this week, another trooper was hit while investigating an accident...amazing. Missouri has laws on the books now, 3 other three others have died in the last 6 months of the same thing, and yet we have another hit. Attention defecit in it's purest's maddening. And a half hour south of arkansas, another lawman was murdered, by a psycho who escaped from new jersey, after attacking patrons of a gay bar. It was later found, that he was on his way toward a full blown killing spree, so that was prevented...although it makes the loss no easier to handle.

Yes, I thank God everyday for the mundane...a feat we only could perform, after the sarge retired from the patrol.

My heart and prayers go out to the law enforcement families that have to deal with the 'ultimate sacrifice'... as well as to the families of those that are still workin the streets, daily. They only get the bad press...and that is so unfair.

Shauna was in chicago this week, taking the final test of the PMF ...the presidential fellowship she made the finals of (THE only student in her law school that made the finals, might i add) Winning this would be fabulous for her...but the competion is national and huge...many wonderful young attnys to be.

but she's shauna, and she has yet to figure out just how special she is...another twin bladed irony of life...her naivety is so much part of her charm...she is unassuming...well liked, as well as likes all.

she doesnt understand she is OUTSTANDING! as a human, as a woman, and as part of me...she's beautiful, smart, organized, goal driven....yet to meet would never even see it...she keeps all of that for her professional life. In person, she is a goofy big sister, who always makes the time, to do a few hours of 'ring around the rosey' with a little sister, who never grows tired of it....she is THE one to watch a chick flick with...and can still make me laugh till my eyes water...

I find great joy in all my children...and with the older three??? also great sadness.

It's hard for me to part with doubt im so excited to watch them carve out their lives....good or bad i can see with mama's experienced eyes...that all of it is shaping them...and im satisfied that all of them are going to be the kind of citizens, and humans, we all want as neighbors on this big ole earth...but, but, my BABIESSSSSSS!! It is everything i can do to keep from crying at just the thought of it...they cannot be this old! They have been my life for so's almost as if i have no life without them....and so, the morph continues....

Those feelings helped me at the beginning, with molly kate, i think....She will have her own challenges to face, but i've never worried about the diagnosis.

i get to have her as a baby a little longer...and now that the top three have flown the nest...i've come to realize, that THAT is not a bad thing...

she's just taking a little more time to get there, and time is becoming the commodity to posess as we age now, isnt it? I am so past the million dollar's TIME! and it sucks sooooooo bad, that by the time we get to realize that....there isnt the alot of time left to make good use of that knowledge OR the physical stamina to enjoy it! to the REALLY is aweful that i have to go BACK to work, just to shop! I catch hell from the working associates....have managers comment on my beer purchase...and am usually attacked by lost customers, who know who i am (20 years tends to keep you close in their memories)

But, all the dora dvd's are trashed...and i have to make a valentine box!

ahhh the mundane...i'll take it!

see ya,


Friday, January 06, 2006

well...i made it, kind of...through Christmas...

it was our biggest ever....but even though people seemed to have more money to spend, they definitely were NOT happy about it!

i was so bummed, that when we finally got to a slow down, i tried to pull a couple of days off to recoup...and caught shit about 'trying to weasle 4 months of vacation out of 4 weeks' so ....crap...

just told my manager to forget it! ill just stay there and work with a bad attitude, and worry about the MESS at home, i just can't seem to get to!!

crap....just another example....he throws my vacation up in my face all the time...wouldnt let me take a day or two...i had to TAKE IT ALL!! well...hell...if i wanted to take it all...i would take it all when my child was out of school!! did that happen??? ohhhhhhh nooooooo we were WAY too busy for me to take time when my kids were home!! grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

he is always throwing the fact that i get 4 weeks of vacation up in my face....well shit...look at it from my point of view, buddy....ive been here 20 made me sign off on working any sundays...which took $150.00 off the top of each check.....i have no retirement...i lose about 2 grand every year on the profit sharing....and my feet/back/legs/hands....are nearly ruined from my devotion to this company

not complaining...just the facts

the fact that ive EARNED 4 weeks of paid vacation a year, is not one for you to fret about...IT'S ALL IVE GOT!! and i should be able to take it...WHEN THE HELL I WANT....not when you dictate to me, and in increments you dictate to me.

i might add...i have called in sick, in 20 years....FEWER TIMES, than our new hires in our area have, in the LAST 6 MONTHS!!

we have had to fire DOZENS of associates...MANY OF THEM MANAGEMENT....for doing the baloney pony at work....even caught a girl who was giving head in the hay trailor!!! FFS!! i have NEVER hosed anyone at work!! that comes with the young-hormone induced group, they think are the ONLY ones who need to be working there!

i would hope, the the upper management would reconsider their decisions about the future of the company...and see that the most valuble associates, SHOULD be their mangagment team...that we SHOULD have in-house management, that doesnt need to relocate...and that THEY should be promoted on time served, and morals proven....NOT ON GENDER!! you need to look at the associates that built your company...that are loyal to sam's ideas...and that are willing to WORK HARD to get the job done!! that is another phrase these youngsters just don't get...HARD WORK

they come in...visit, hide, talk, gossip, talk on their cell phones...and SCREW AROUND!! is this how you're going to keep the company viable????? THINK ABOUT IT!!

anyway....just bidin my time...and they can harass long time associates all they want...i still show up 10 times harder and smarter than those young, 'low cost-no benefits' people, that they think they should hand the reins to the company to.....

and i know something that he doesnt know.....after they get rid of all of us....they are gonna git rid of HIM!! welcome to my world, mr management.....

i can't believe he accused ME of weasling ANYTHING outta the company...hell, im an old-timer....the ones they expected to work off the clock.....the ones that built the company into what it is....some like me...just won a HUGE lawsuit for what was expected of them....

i remember the old Christmas...we would have to stay after the doors closed on Christmas eve...and reset the store for january....i wouldnt get home on Christmas eve till midnight or after (by the you KNOW how hard it is, and how much it costs, to get a sitter on Christmas EVE??????)...anyway...i would wrap till 4am, drop, and the kids would be up by 5 to see the ONE gift that santa brought....(i was making $3.45/hr) morning??? i would have to be back at the store at 5am.

point being...i wouldnt take a MINUTE from this company....and everytime he gets in my face with a 'weasling' comment like guts churn! HOW RUDE!!

funny thing order to be in management, you have to be willing to relocate at the drop of a hat....everytime i was asked to step up...they would stick that out there first...KNOWING that as a single parent...i could NOT just up and jump and drag three kids all over the country....

well...this particular member of management, had come back to us as an associate! you see, they told him it was time for him to relocate at whatever store he was training in...and he they BUSTED him! he came back to us....worked for about a month as an associate...and then PRESTO-CHANGO...he is again a member of management...and not one that has to relocate!

so i guess the rule is...if you are a WOMAN, and want to be a member of have to relocate....with the men, we'll just work around that little prob.....

ugh!!'s my post from the room....just to journal mollys life...

mollysmommaMemberPosts: 1187(1/2/06 8:45 pm)Reply Edit
oh well FFS, i give up!!

i have all the learning stuff....her and i constantly work on phonics, letters, pronouncing...

she just walked into the living room.....looked at the missouri basketball game....threw her arms up in the air, and yelled as plain as could be....TOUCHDOWN!!!

and then slammed some tippy cup, and faked a belch

heaven help us all....