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It's been a rough day, ok, a rough WEEK at the little house in Autismville, as a 14 yr old girl, who has been flooded with hormones is hard enough to live with, let alone one with all the extra enhancements that come with my 'little angel'
She doesn't like bathing anymore. Out of the blue she just started fighting it. This morning it took me AND the sarge 20 minutes to get her into the tub. After we finally got the deed done she decided to add the exclamation point onto her disgust by throwing everything she could reach. (add vacuum, spot bot, , impromptu scrubbing and washing a load of towels to my list for the day)
She can't help it...it really hurts to be a girl sometimes, and she has no idea why this keeps happening. I'm calm, daddy's calm...we understand. The pets just run when they see her coming. School was out for us yesterday, Monday, for a "teacher's in service" which was a drill on how to handle an active shooter. (man oh man, the things those poor people have to learn on TOP of everything educational) but we decided to keep her home one more day.
She settled, enjoyed the rest of her bath, and was calm enough for me to take her to Walmart. I really didn't want to add that trip as my BP was now sky rocketing, (staying calm on the outside takes it's toll on the inside) but in order to clean up all the messes that she and my critters made, I had to go get laundry stuff, as well as more feed so that the critters could make more messes.
Miss smarty pants was told on the way in, that because we had to buy dog and cat food, she could not ride in the cart. A good excuse to give her because in reality, I can no longer push her around in a cart. She doesn't look very big because all that weight is compacted into her little 'spongebob' body, but she is really getting to be too heavy for us old folks.
I walk in, pull out a cart, look around and no Molly. No, she's in the vestibule where they keep the Hummer-Carts. Those monstrosities that allow her to ride in the back with plenty of room to put the dog food in the front. Yep, she has figured out a way for her to ride, and me to get the well-needed aerobic exercise of pushing a 200 pound cart that turns like a semi.
But...she's calm. She found a new purse that she's wearing and grinning with that (what the boys call) stretch-face smile, the one she keeps for when she's REALLY satisfied with the way things are going.
I wheel around to the pretzel aisle and stop, because it's loaded with women and carts and chatter and I don't drive my semi well enough to maneuver around that kind of traffic. One lady is on her cell phone asking her hubby what kind of chips he wants...a mother and daughter are having some giggles, a girl is working on inventory and so on...their carts are all parked on the right, they are all standing on the left.
Molly has a few words that she can use appropriately, and we have taught her so as to make her life less frustrating. "sorry, move please" "Scuse me" and things of that nature. But not today...today miss grumpy is not in the mood for all this business between her and her pretzels...so in her loudest Missouri State Trooper voice, and with hand motions commanding from her blue Hummer seat, she stands and yells..."WATCH OUTTTTT!!!!" which was articulated PERFECTLY and definitely silenced the crowd.
I was mortified..."MOLLY! that is NOT what we say!"
"Scuse me, sorry"
To the first cell phone gramma, who was probably now wishing she had been wearing Depends, I said "Yes, excuse me is the polite way" to which the gramma replied with a twinkle..."Yes, but not HALF as effective!" Everyone else smiled (and moved out of the way) and had chatter for Molly, now that she had made such an entrance...even the associates working in there were laughing. (Trust me, sometimes we do think the same thing, especially when the bosses are demanding work to be completed in a hurry)
So, we made it out with our new purse and to the car without anymore hassle..I think she'll be ready to go back to school tomorrow. They could handle it efficiently, but one more day off wasn't going to hurt anything.
Fun times at my place. Now? I'm off to take care of the tornado that's gone through my living room on this unscheduled long weekend. Hopefully it will be calm all day tomorrow.
The hardest thing about Autism, to me, is the loss of communication. Through intervention, speech therapy, and hard work, Molly has some words back (if they're important to her) but we don't have "nomal" conversations. We have routine ones, like
"what cereal would you like this morning?"
"eggs, toast" (ugh)
with food? she can be pretty verbal.
She hears and understands everything, and we talk to her like we would talk to any other tween....
"TURN THAT CRAP DOWN!!"
Probably the worst? Her not being able to
#1 be aware of the location of her pain and
#2 being unable to tell me she has a pain.
Otherwise, our conversations will consist of me asking a question, and her answering with all her words.
"How was school today?"
"Aubrey Jo, Owie (Zoey), Sarge (dog) Puppy (Mizzy the dog) CAT (Lucifer) Koo (koo kitty never got a name, molly just named her) and Kee (the new little bit kitten) Bill, Babe (Gabe) *her brothers* and Harter" (we haven't quite figured out who that is.)
She repeats these names of those nearest and dearest to her heart, (Pongebob, Quidward, Dora, Boo Bear (Little Bear)) and moves her hands the way you would if you were in a conversation with me, but it never makes any sense, and without the update list from school, i would have NO IDEA what happened there today. (verbally that is...if she's having trouble i can read it thru her attitude)
Yesterday was Friday....I'm trying to get her to understand the days of the week. We have a calendar at home of the days, so she can understand the pain of Monday and the joy of Friday!
I pick her up from school on Fridays, also...another Joy, and IF SHE'S GOOD, we make a run thru "Donalds" (mcdonalds...a new word for her, again, only if it's REALLY important)
I start in after the smiling pick up, with my usual conversation..."how was school today?"
nothing.
"Was it sno-cone day"
nothing but a smile
"What color of sno-cone did you get?"
"BLUE!"
omg!! she answered me!! WOOHOOOO! I was SO excited!! she actually TOLD ME SOMETHING!!
I kept my delight somewhat curbed....until i got home and could text her aide. She confirmed that indeed the sno-cone was blue, and the party ensued!!
It may seem small to the parent of typpies (NTs or Neuro Typicals, typpies in my house) but to a mom that's never had a real conversation with her kid for 14 years? it's HUGE!!
Have a great weekend. :-)
It's beautiful here this morning...misting rain, low humidity, cool temps....our first hint of autumn. our first day where it's not at LEAST 80 degrees with 90% humidity.
Fridays are fun days, and it's usually the ONLY day of the week i can get my little miss happy to be going to school. This morning, even that wasn't motivating her, but we keep on, calm and steady, going through the morning routine.
I finally tell her, "I'm going to the car, get your shoes on and get out here, we don't want to be late for FRIDAY!!!!"
Already in the Tahoe, I watch as she walks to me sporting flip flops. Ugh...she loves them but can't walk very fast in them. I KNOW they have to be a pain in the aide's side, but, you know, all the REALLY COOL girls wear flip flops to school, and evidently all year long.
Right behind her is daddy, in his robe and slippers, in the misty rain, carrying her regular shoes. Yea, we got her figured out. I'll send the other pair in her backpack for backup.
We have an uneventful trip, pull into the drop off line at school, pop the seatbelt, and I grab her pack to add the shoes, as well as the lunchbox full of 'reward' snacks.
I notice the flip flops laying on the floor..."Hey, Put your shoes on."
Now, at this point, I must explain about Molly's 'hit and miss' autism. I didn't get one of those really neat kids that like all their stuff put up in the same place, I got miss 'likes all of her stuff dumped all over' The stuff that's really important to her? Oh she hides that stuff. A really un-fun game of hideNseek, particularly if it involves food stuffs.
She also doesn't hold hygiene at the top of her priority list.....but? the bottoms of her shoes must NEVER be dirty.
Yep, this girl that could grow worms under her nails if we didn't go through the nightly scrubs, refuses to let ANYTHING stick to the bottom of her shoes. I keep antibiotic wet ones in the car, and have actually pulled the car over to clean her shoe bottoms so she'll settle down.
This morning, this first really cool morning of the season, I watch in horror as she picks her shoes up and tucks them under her arm.
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! we HAVE to have shoes on to go to school!! Miss smarty pants has been quietly contemplating this whole situation on the 10 minute trip, and has a lightbulb over her head now. If she doesn't put the shoes on at ALL, they won't get DIRTY!!!
I desperately grab for the other pair, maybe she'll wear one pair, and carry the other, switching them inside. "Here, put THIS shoe on instead!"
Now? There are 3 shoes tucked under her arm, and two bare feet on the floor.
The aide opens her car door, sizes up the situation, and busts into laughter..."It's ok, we'll fix it up inside"
All the other teachers waiting to help the other car-fuls of kids, are now looking at me (because now we are holding up the process) so I explain about the shoes.
As I pulled away from the line, i glance in the rear view, watching my barefoot daughter inching across the cold cement & I was happy that we could provide such a good laugh this morning for all the other teachers.
She can always surprise me. Molly 1, Mommy 0.
